Unconditional Challenge: FizzBuzz without `if`

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Following Jesus; Husband; Father; Developer; Gamer; Tinkerer; Writing about code
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You'll find a lot more responses to this challenge on my crosspost to DEV
A challenge to make FizzBuzz without if's (with a follow up comparison of FP and OO programming paradigms using their respective solutions)
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As the title says, make a classic FizzBuzz function or method without using if/else (or equivalents like ternaries, ?:, sneaky).
Specifically:
3, then return Fizz5, then return Buzz3 and 5, then return the combination FizzBuzzThe expected outputs for the first fifteen numbers in order is:
1,2,Fizz,4,Buzz,Fizz,7,8,Fizz,Buzz,11,Fizz,13,14,FizzBuzz
Do this without "secret" conditionals like || and && (in loosely typed languages like JavaScript) or null coalescing operators like ?? or null safe operators like ?. or &..
Also no looping constructs that could be abused into a conditional like while or for.
I tagged functional on this post because functional programming can be used to solve this.
I tagged oop on this post because the original object oriented concepts of message passing can be used to solve this.
Post below with your answers!
Think this is impossible? I'll post my own answers in both FP and OOP styles next week.